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Cool Blue (1990) - ★☆☆☆☆

What's the point of this movie? Is it supposed to be a rom-com? There's romance (I guess, but not enough to qualify it as a simple romance), but it's not funny. Is it a mystery? Maybe, but the mysteries never really get solved, nor are they ever fully articulated. Is it a drama? I'm pretty sure dramas are supposed to be interesting, at the very least. I'm not saying every movie has to fit into a specific category—far from it! But they should, at least, have some sense to them, especially if they're going to be so ill-defined as this one. 


Cool Blue started out strong—a fun scene with Woody shoplifting a convenience shop (good old fashioned fun). Shortly thereafter, it's revealed that Woody's character, Dustin, is an artist (as confirmed by his paint stained jeans). This is exciting! A fresh new role for Woody to take on. 

But then the movie enters a speedy downward spiral. He sees a woman at an art gallery, spends one night with her, and falls so madly in love (obsession?) with her that he creates what looks like scores of paintings just of her. It's obvious we're supposed to see why he likes her so much—she wears a baggy white blouse, sits on the floor to eat Chinese food, and puts on lopsided blue sunglasses to make a Picasso joke—she's cool, quirky, and altogether Not Like Other Girls. 

And, oh, I forgot—she's also Mysterious!

We know she's Mysterious from the first time we see her, because she has a red scarf tied to the strap of her bag. Then, we find out her name is Christiane, which only enhances the mystery! What the heck kind of name is that?? Then, we find out she's married! Then, we find out she hates her husband! Then, we find out she hangs out in a model apartment without the landlord's permission. Then, we find out she has a little sister. Then, the little sister tells us she's not allowed to talk about Christiane! Then, after Christiane finds out Dustin had been obsessively painting her for months, after she throws a bucket of blue paint on him, and after they make up, she tells him to meet her at a museum—mysterious behavior at its finest, folks!

The annoying thing is that none of this stuff about Christiane is ever resolved, unless I'm meant to believe that she's mysterious because she has an abusive husband and ran away from her family. That's not really mysterious, though, so I'm just not quite sure why the movie tries so hard to make the viewer understand her that way. 

I have to be honest—I'm pretty disappointed in this movie! It's one of Woody's very earliest acting credits, so I wanted it to be a good one. I guess it just shows how far he's come. 


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