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Wag the Dog (1997) - ★★★★★


Sometimes, it feels like the universe is giving me a sign that I am right about every single thing I have ever thought, and everyone else is wrong. Like, when I discovered that Al Pacino was but 5'7" tall. This fact—simple, charming, enlivening—got me thinking about something important. Why are all movie stars these days tall? 

Hugh Jackman, Jake Gyllenhaal, Ben Affleck, Idris Elba, and countless others—all absurdly tall men, all movie stars. And yet, there's something sickeningly modern about each of these men, about their action movie careers, and yes—about their height. 

Tallness is one of the great modern scourges. No one, attending the movie theater, wishes to see a very tall man with long rangy limbs and sunken tallman cheekbones punching and flipping and shooting guns. Rather, I want to see a petite compact movie star. Short actors fit on the screen better. Their clothes fit better. And they're just nicer to look at overall. You can't deny me this!

So, a couple weeks ago when I discovered that Dustin Hoffman is a different person that Philip Seymour Hoffman was, suffice it to say I was beyond delighted to discover that this tiny little man was but 5'6". This discovery sent me on a bit of a Dustin Hoffman binge, which led me to discover that Tom Cruise—perhaps THE movie star of ALL time—is a compact 5'7" inches!!! 

Anyway, imagine my delight when I found Woody (unfortunately slightly tall, though we won't hold that against him) shared a movie with little Dustin Hoffman! An absolute thrill.

This is a great movie. I think it's about what they call the "deep state." Who else thinks the real deep state is the conspiracy to remove short movie stars from our movies?????????


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