Woody Harrelson Film Festival

Incredibly bad garbage trash movie, which I think director/creator "Adam Rifkin" probably thought was clever, ironic, and blisteringly self-aware, but was in fact quite the opposite of each of those things. A real slog.

This is a sad case of Wow-I-Really-Was-Looking-Forward-To-This-Movie-Because-It-Has-'Cowboy'-In-The-Title-And-I-Love-Cowboys-And-Therefore-I-Assumed-I-Would-Enjoy-It-But-Instead-I-Was-Once-Again-Reminded-That-My-Idea-Of-Cowboys,-Which-Was-Forged-In-The-Fires-Of-My-Youthful-Days-As-An-Almost-Horse-girl-And-Nurtured-By-My-Continuous-Consumption-Of-Cowboy-Related-Media-Which-Originates-From-Or-Takes-Place-In-The-60s-(and by 60s I mean the ones that took place either in the nineteenth or twentieth centuries),-Does-Not-Always-Align-With-Other-People's-Ideas-About-Cowboys-And-Therefore-I-Am-Often-Dissappointed-By-People-Trying-To-Make-Cowboys-And-There-Stories-"Funny"-And-Crass-Rather-Than-Mournful-And-Wholesome.

Deeply, painfully, meaningless and irrelevant. Woody's only been in a few movies that were actually difficult for me to get through—most of the bad ones are at least entertaining or hateful enough that it doesn't feel like one thousand eternities pass in the time it takes me to watch them. And if they are that dreadful, at least Woody's presence in them serves to sweeten the deal enough to make the experience bearable. In this case, unfortunately, Woody's appearance is one of the most irrelevant yet, as he plays a role in a movie which the characters go to see, and is on screen for no more than a few seconds.  It's easy to tell what kind of movie this movie was trying to be. But don't we already have enough incompetent dads and precocious daughters filling up our silver screens? And if we wanted more, wouldn't we turn our attention instead to Hallmark Movies and Mysteries so we could at least get a dose of Christmas spirit along the way? In short, this movie...

Today's popcorn classic is L.A. Story , starring the great Steve Martin ( The Pink Panther and Father of the Bride ). This is a real a Hollywood movie for you Hollywood buffs and also for you movie buffs. It's about the magic of Hollywood, and therefore it's also really about movie magic. And the runtime is 98 minutes, which is a little more than an hour and a half. Steve Martin! One of the greats.

I really thought that after seeing nearly 70 Woody Harrelson movies in a little more than a year that I had a pretty full grasp on his range—which indeed is quite wide. There's cop Woody, criminal Woody, rough-around-the-edges Woody, heart-of-gold Woody, cowboy Woody, military Woody,  and bespectacled Woody, and so on. I thought on this, my sixty-seventh movie, nothing could surprise me anymore. Nothing really could have prepared me for deranged, middle-aged, fleece sheep costume Woody.  It's alright, I guess. Just nothing I'd ever call 'necessary'—an assessment which holds true for the rest of this movie, too. 

If Pa was here he simply would have taken Freddy fishing and talked some sense into him and then everything would be better. Not sure what Laura was doing in the big city, anyway.